Ah, the modern romance: where love meets ledger sheets and finance plays third wheel on every date. Welcome to the 21st-century courtship, where honesty about student debt can send potential partners running faster than a bull in Pamplona. Blessing Akinsilo, fresh out of law school, found this out the hard way. On her first real date in years, she dared to mention her six figures of student loan debt, only to watch her aspiring actor date’s interest vanish faster than his chances of landing a leading role.
It’s not exactly a scene from a rom-com. Instead of a “meet-cute,” we have a “meet-credit-score,” where the only sparks flying are from the friction of financial anxiety. Blessing’s date was shocked by her debt revelation, which, given his own precarious financial state, is akin to a Titanic survivor being surprised by water. The evening ended with them splitting the check and awkward goodbyes—a sober reminder that in the economics of dating, debt disclosure can be a dealbreaker.
Fast forward a few months, and Blessing faced a similar digital desertion on a dating app. Her financial openness about student loans, intended as a camaraderie-building moment, turned into a ghost story when her match realized her debt dwarfed his own. It’s a common tale in the dating world, where people are more comfortable discussing politics or religion than the real holy grail: personal finance.
But why all this secrecy? Perhaps it’s because financial transparency threatens the illusion of stability and success that we desperately cling to in our personal lives, much like central banks clinging to the illusion of control over inflation. Or maybe it’s the fear of judgment in a society intoxicated by the myth of meritocracy, where debt is seen as a personal failing rather than a systemic issue.
Yet, while couples dance around these financial discussions, the reality is bleak. According to a 2024 Bankrate report, Americans would rather discuss the latest political scandal or theological debate than reveal their paycheck or debt load. It seems the only thing more taboo than money is admitting that we don’t have as much of it as we pretend.
In the grand theater of the absurd that is modern dating, financial transparency is the uninvited guest. It’s the elephant in the room, sipping a martini at the bar while everyone pretends it’s not there. And as long as we continue to avoid these conversations, we’ll remain trapped in a cycle of financial insecurity and romantic disillusionment. After all, love may be blind, but it certainly isn’t cheap.
